looks like lil'g is taking control of this here blog again.
the usual unspoken notice, no rhyme, no reason, good enough for you peons, ungrateful, disobedient wretches, no explanation required. it's the new way of doing business. you don't deserve the time.
or, perhaps you hadn't noticed. i picture the reader ship of this blog as a rather obedient group, holding to a typically upper echelon, educated lot, unwilling to fault what cannot be simply critiqued, however lightly.
but when you do fall under the default, instigating label, it may be totally, well, an affront to the image you maintain along with the peer group you associate with.
i, on the other hand, find myself in conflict more often than not, simply for the the recognition of experience in an unfair world.
or, perhaps i should give up any uncertain themes , albeit a crusade as , unhealthy, and return to haikai, exclusively. you may have noticed some diversion.
but try as i might, i should recall the forecast that all is lost, to a degree, and the adage that history rhymes. usually without correction.
after all, the reality is that battling the status quo is mostly time wasted and not worth the effort . how soon do we realize that ai is not the gift we are led to believe; nor the generator of income it is hyped to be.
i've been purported to be a cancer victim of late, a diagnosis i take with as much importance as i do any institutional twaddle from our betters we abide and quote by. truth be known, we know little or nothing from these services.
more important, my only true friend suffers too, and i hope to make myself presentable and useful in her hour of need.
otherwise, i find myself in that enviable position of being totally alone, a complaint i brought on myself with great desire.
i just can't help it. fortunately, some difficulties cloud the horizon, because after all, what's a man with out a mission.
you are all welcome to choose your own.
Haikai yes and all else you do-think-feel-suffer. Still have that renku we did together with others, Kris moon, sabaki. LMK you know who I am since I left FB. Very happy we can write on these here blogs and back and forth with each other. Your art being, well, it’s here, still. Am glad. Donna at word pond
ReplyDeleteand i forgot to extend thanks for your message above.
ReplyDeletenot sure what im suffering from yet; the calls and demands from providers got to be overwhelming - so i told them - no. three times iin my life i' ve faltered, and three times i fought my way back.they can wait. besides, it hurts like hell.
all i need is a little guidance for the young ones. and they need nothing more, either. they can carry their own.
the sad part is i'm losing my friend. i mean, my friend. discovered today she's already been in hospital, and she suffers so ... strange, that im such an odd duck, im at a loss how to act. she's, she's such a tough individual, and proves me a fool quite readily.
the two of us are no strangers to dysfunction, if you'd call it that. yet, when i was alone, really alone, and about to accept it, she came by, and took my arm. id assumed all had rejected me - my private wish, i suppose, overdramatic and hasty. what an actor.
although when you're completely alone, there's just no performance to keep.
gah, i hope i can make her comfortable. i'd like to share something, something i'm afraid i can't give - safety, and a place to feel trust.
not that loner. we'll see.